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Dear Diary

Going into another single season. I don’t know when this season for me will end but what I do know is, it’s a special single season. Going through a breakup is not easy. It hurts, it’s sad, you feel alone at times and who doesn’t want to come home to their forever after? Although It’s another single season for me, I know this season will be different. I am walking into 30 guys. I am about to be 30. I may not be married, have children or have the career I want yet but guess what? ITS COMING. You see, I always did everything on my time. Doing things I wanted to do when I wanted to do it. When I started getting on the right path with God and spending more time with him, I was able to understand all the things I was doing wrong. Not only that, I was able to create a relationship with myself and love on myself a little more. 

Back to what I was saying though. I am going into my 30 year old season as well. During this season I want to accomplish the things that I’ve been going after for so long. I have to seek God into my steps. Get into his presence and allow him to speak to me and through me. I want to be able to heal the way I’m supposed to heal walking into this season. I want to forgive the people that have betrayed me and hurt me in my past. I want to remain in his grace and to walk out on crazy faith. This year is going to be the year I learn what God has been wanting for my life. Not moving how I want to move but to move how he wants me to move. These past two years has been challenging. I have had so many failures, downfalls, heart breaks and inconsistencies. Don’t get me wrong now, I have been blessed those years as well. However, this year 2022, I want more of God, accomplishments, and self-love. I want this season of my life to be WHAT GOD WANTS FOR MY LIFE. Even if I’m single for only 4 months (lol you see how I said that), I want who God has for me. His pick will always be the best pick for me.

Going into my 30 year old season, I don’t want to repeat the same cycles. Yes it feels good to go back to the pattern’s and cycles you know. It’s so comfortable there right?! Who doesn’t want to be comfortable? I want to be comfortable God! But guess what? Those repeated cycles gave me the same repeated outcomes. I got nowhere in my life seeking those same comfortable cycles. Make me uncomfortable. Show me the unknown and prepare me for whatever door you’re about to open in this season of my life. I want all the smoke God lol. I’m ready to go on this unknown Journey. I don’t know what to expect but I am praying and seeking God when making decisions and for the things I would love to accomplish this year. I am not perfect and I know it won’t be easy but guess what, I AM READY FOR IT ALL THIS YEAR! LETS GET IT♥️

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